Forgotten Love
by risingdancer
Summary: Clarisse and Joseph are happily married, but when he suddenly becomes distant, will she be able to stay strong or will she find herself drifting into the arms of another? Is their love strong enough to keep ahold of the forgotten love that once was?
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Princess Diaries 1 and 2 belong to Disney, Buena Vista and Meg Cabot, and I do not own any of these characters.

* * *

**Chapter 1**

Clarisse had just finished the awful paperwork she'd struggled to get through. Even though Mia had been crowned Queen just over seven months ago, Clarisse understood how long it could take for her Grand-daughter to adjust to the difficult role, and therefore was happy to help her as much as she possibly could. Needing a breath of fresh air, she decided to take a well-earned break.

As she was walking through the gardens, she saw Joseph sitting in the gazebo, with a sad, yet thoughtful look on his face. The same expression he had for almost three weeks now. It made her heart sink. Lately he had been avoiding conversation with her, and what confused her the most was the fact that it was very sudden. She couldn't figure out what she was doing wrong.

Some days he would be the caring, loving person she fell in love with, and the rest of the time he would act as though he were a different man. He was like someone she didn't know, someone she would rather not get to know. She knew something was bothering him, even by looking into his eyes. The twinkle in them had disappeared. No matter how many times she tried to discuss with him what was on his mind, she always got the same results; he just avoided the conversation and changed the subject entirely. When she woke up in the morning, he was never lying next to her, with his arms around her keeping her safe and warm. Instead he was always standing on the balcony, leaning on the railing, not speaking a work until breakfast. Even then, he rarely engaged in conversation.

However, Thanksgiving was coming up and she needed to break the ice with him as soon as possible. No matter how difficult the task.

...

After dinner, Clarisse decided to retire for the night. She knew it would do her a lot of good to go into the kitchen and reflect on her thoughts as she often did when something was troubling her, but Clarisse was far too exhausted, and needed her sleep desperately.

When she entered her bedroom, she wasn't surprised to find that he wasn't there. Over the years, she'd grown accustomed to having him near her most of the time, and even more after their wedding. Although she had always been a very independent woman, feeling so distanced from him made her feel incomplete and alone. Not being able to communicate with him was tearing them apart. She missed him deeply, and couldn't bare to be separated from him any longer.

After a few minutes of tossing and turning, she gave up, knowing sleep wasn't going to arrive soon. Especially when she knew Joseph wasn't there next to her. So, she got out of bed, slipped her dressing gown on, and walked down to the kitchen to get herself a cup of tea.

Hoping that she would have time on her own to think, she poked her head around the door to see if anyone else was occupying the room. Joseph was sitting at the end of the table slowly sipping a cup of coffee while reading a newspaper. She wanted to turn around and run straight back to her bedroom. _"No!" _She thought, mentally slapping herself.

_"He is your husband, and you're running away from him!" _

Gathering her thoughts of how to approach him, she slowly opened the door and walked over to the kettle, looking over her shoulder ever few seconds to see if he had even noticed her. But, every time she looked, he still had his eyes on the newspaper in front of him.

_"This isn't going to be easy". _She thought quietly to herself.

The silence was more awkward than she had ever thought it to be, and it had to be broken. Knowing that he wasn't about to say anything, Clarisse tried to quickly think up a casual question that would most likely get him talking.

"I'm… not disturbing you am I?" , she asked. Her face lit up as he put his newspaper down and looked at her. She smiled at him. "You look like you could do with some company, darling."

"I suppose I could. I was starting to get quite lonely down here by myself." He was grumbling miserably. That was enough to make her blood boil. There was only so much of his mood she could take. Clarisse quietly sighed to herself impatiently, she could hear herself screaming in her head, yet all the while trying desperately to keep her fustration at bay. Maybe she wasn't as strong as she thought she was. Maybe, when it came to dealing with certain situations, she just didn't know how to cope. But, she knew that she couldn't waste any more time thinking about how to confront her husband. She needed to know what was wrong with him, and she needed to know now. Not only so she could get her husband back, but her best friend as well.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thanks to the reviewers Clarisse Renaldi, bluegirl-783, MaddieGaines, JulieFan35, adda edwards, VictoriaGr, Zsulie, and CJmynixMG for taking the time to read and review the story! It gives me motivation to continue writing :) **

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**Chapter 2 **

Clarisse sat at the table trying to come up with a way that could possibly get Joseph to open up about how he was feeling. Her past attempts of asking him straight out what was the matter didn't prove very effective, so she decided to try a different approach.

"Thanksgiving is coming up soon" She said. He took a sip of his coffee and nodded.

"Is Mia's mother and stepfather flying up for the weekend?" He asked with little interest.

"No, not this year. Mia doesn't want her mother traveling with the baby, and has convinced her to stay in America. Mia told me that she would like to take some time off to go visit them for thanksgiving. And of course she'd like to introduce Nicolas to her family as her new _squeeze_ for the first time." She stopped to see if he would say anything.

He smiled a genuine smile. She felt butterflies in her stomach when she saw the long lost twinkle in his eyes. But a moment later, it had disappeared. He went back to the distant stranger that had taken over throughout the past few weeks.

"_It's a start." _She thought to herself. She tried again. "You should invite your family over for Thanksgiving. It would be nice to meet them."

Joseph didn't say anything for a moment. Finally he said, "You mean my brother? I don't know.. We haven't been keeping in touch over the years."

"Well, then this will be a good chance to make amendments then." She reached for his hand, and to her greatest relief, he accepted hers.

"As you wish, my dear." He said. And before getting up to put his coffee mug in the sink, he lifted her hand to his lips, and kissed it.

She smiled, and got up to put her mug in the sink as well. Joseph turned to her.  
"I think I'm going to head off to bed." he said. Clarisse reached for his arm, but he turned away before she had the chance. He walked towards the door. "Goodnight." was all he said.

Clarisse stood frozen in place for minutes afterwards. She tried hard to stop her tears from falling, without any luck _"What's happening to us?" _She thought to herself, wiping the tears from her eyes. After she had composed herself, she walked slowly up to her room. She quietly slipped into bed, careful not to wake him. She took a deep breath to calm herself, and at the same time took in the sweet smell of Joseph's cologne. All she wanted to do, more than anything else, was to snuggle into his warm embrace. How she longed for her husband's touch, but the only thing stopping her was the fact that this wasn't her husband, and she swore she could feel her heart break at the very thought of it. All she could do at the moment was pray that he would soon find his way back to her.

* * *

The following day, Clarisse was in despair once again. She woke up alone, ate breakfast with Joseph in almost complete silence, and then secluded herself to her office for most of the day. She'd spoken to Joseph briefly at dinner about thanksgiving, finding out that he had called his brother in Spain that afternoon. His flight would arrive later the next day. _"Maybe seeing his brother again will help him ease up." _Clarisse thought, trying to be optimistic. She was indeed looking forward to meeting Joseph's brother, but she was nervous at the same time. Maybe he wouldn't like her? Or maybe Joseph had mentioned the tension between himself and Clarisse, and his brother would take Joseph's side? She told herself not to worry about such things until the time came tomorrow when he arrived. Once again, Clarisse and Joseph kept to their sides of the bed, both falling into an uneasy sleep.

* * *

The next morning Clarisse picked out an outfit that would be suitable for meeting Joseph's brother. She chose an elegant, but plain pink suit. Why she was choosing an outfit so carefully today, she didn't know. First impressions were important, she supposed, even though he was just like a member of her family now. She took one last look in the mirror, and left the suite.

Mia and Nicolas were leaving that day as well, so Clarisse drove with them to the airport. Joseph was with her of course, but once again, he seemed slightly distracted. Clarisse desperately hoped Mia hadn't noticed anything, because she didn't know how she could explain it to her grand-daughter, since she herself barely understood what was going on. Thankfully Mia hadn't noticed anything, or if she had, she didn't say anything. Their departure went very well, and Clarisse stayed, watching the plane fly away until it was out of sight. Then Clarisse and Joseph returned to the car, and were driven home by one of the guards.

An hour and a half later, Shades came in to Clarisse's office to notify her of the arrival of Joseph's brother. She made her way to the Grand Entrance of the palace, meeting Joseph in the hallway on the way. She smiled at him.

"I.. I'm looking forward to meeting your brother." She tried to make small talk.

He looked at her, his smile not quite making it to his eyes. Clarisse focused on the doors straight ahead. They finished the short walk into the Grand Entrance just as the guards were opening the doors for their new guest.

The man walked into the foyer. Clarisse took in his appearance. His hair was about the same colour as Joseph's, only slightly grayer and thicker. He had the same twinkling dark brown eyes as Joseph's. One thing she noticed was that this man wasn't as fit as her husband was. But she had to admit, he was quite attractive.

She gave him a warm smile and reached out her hand to greet him. Joseph was standing one step behind her, acting more like her bodyguard than her husband. She pushed it to the back of her mind.

"Hello, it's very nice to meet you at last." She said.

He accepted her hand, and kissed the top of it. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Your Majesty."

She laughed. "Please, call me Clarisse. After all we are family now."

"Very well." He said, smiling. "I'm Charles."


	3. Chapter 3

I'm sorry I haven't published a new chapter in such a long time! I hope this makes it up to you!

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**Chapter 3**

It was late in the evening and Clarisse was once again sitting alone in the kitchen, but this time, with a content smile spread across her face. She was certain that the week - so far - couldn't have gone better, starting with how she had gotten along so amazingly well with Charles straight away, to when they were laughing and joking at dinner, even Joseph had gotten involved in some conversation which of course she was thrilled about. Maybe Charles travelling here _was_ the best thing for Joseph after all, he was such a kind-hearted man, he had only arrived here four days ago yet she felt as though she'd known him for a lifetime. However, underneath his light-spirited personality, there always seemed to be a deep sadness there too. Clarisse had started to see that whenever Charles was deep in thought, she never failed to notice the flicker of sadness, the hurt that seemed to pass his eyes for a split second every now and again. It was like there was something he was locking away which only appeared when he thought he was alone. She was so deep in thought herself that she didn't notice the gentle knock coming from the door or the man who walked slowly inside.

"I hope I'm not disturbing you at this late hour, Clarisse. Mind if I join you for a moment?", Charles asked in just above a whisper as he continued walking towards her without waiting for an answer.

"Oh no not at all". She grinned at him, happy to have some company for a change. She wasn't tired and so far she didn't have any trouble keeping a conversation interesting with this man, which was a lot more than she could say about her own husband.

"You couldn't sleep either?", he asked while pouring himself a cup of coffee, breaking her once again out of her reverie.

She looked up at him before replying. "Oh I've been coming down here at this hour quite often recently. I find it helps me unwind before going to bed."

He chuckled lightly again. "I should try that, I find myself constantly tossing and turning most of the night these days" he said, mostly to himself. Clarisse knitted her eyebrows in wonder. Maybe she was right? But, as much as she wanted to, she knew she had to resist the urge to ask him why. He spoke again. "I'd also like to thank you and Joseph for inviting me here. I appreciate it."

"Oh, you're a pleasure to have here, Charles, really". her eyes beamed up at him. Suddenly, a wave of tiredness came over her, so she decided to retire for the night. "And, as much as it's been lovely talking to you, I'm afraid it's time for me to be getting some rest", she continued, almost regretting it.

"Well, I have to admit I won't be far behind you. I'm starting to get a little tired myself. Sweet dreams, Clarisse.". He replied, raising his mug slightly to her.

"Goodnight, Charles", she smiled once again at him and left.

On her way to her bedroom she could only think again of how wonderful the place had been since he first arrived. Like tonight, she was so genuinely happy to have him to talk to that she silently hoped she would find him there tomorrow night as well. Her body instantly came to a halt at that though. Wait! Shouldn't she be hoping for _Joseph_ to be there instead? It was only then that Clarisse became fully aware of what was happening to her relationship with him and it scared her more than anything. Yes, his mood had changed a little since his brother arrived, and he had started to talk a lot more.. But was his conversation directed towards her? He only seemed to talk to Charles. That was another problem. Chalres was constantly invading her thoughts and she had no idea why _he_ was occupying her mind lately. Sure she had concern for him, but no matter how much she tried to push him out of her thoughts, those thoughts only got stronger, reminding her of how well they got along and her shameful slight attraction to him. Finally reaching her bedside, she could do nothing more than to throw herself carelessly onto her bed, cursing herself for her futile attempt to stop herself from crying. She didn't understand Joseph any more, she didn't even understand _herself_ any more. She felt completely helpless and alone.

* * *

Clarisse spent the next few days burying herself in tons of what was meant to be Mia's paperwork, but this time she didn't care. She was desperate to push the absurd thoughts out of her head, even if it meant having to struggle through the dreaded work. It didn't matter. At first she just blamed it on her over-tiredness, but the same thoughts had been constantly occupying her mind for days and she was certain it would drive her mad soon enough. She was tired of feeling lonely, tired of being married to a man she didn't know any more, and tired of the lack of attention he was giving her. Seeing his face once a day was all she saw of him.. She couldn't take it any longer! But then, as if on cue, a firm knock sounded at the door making her head shoot up instantaneously. She cleared her throat and sat up straight, putting her guard back up again. "Come in", she said clearly. Her eyes lit up at the sight of no other than Joseph walking towards her with the all too familiar, unreadable expression on his face.

"Joseph! There's something I've been meaning to ask y-"

"Clarisse, I'm sorry but I have to leave for a few days. I'm visiting America to check on security." She stood up, a look of disbelief on her face.

"But.. Joseph, can't you send someone else to do it? What about Scott?"

He was looking at the floor, barely making eye-contact. When his eyes found hers, he paused for a moment, as if contemplating.

"No, I have to do this myself. I'll be leaving in about an hour."

And with those last words he left, not speaking another word or even looking back. She just stared at the closed door, her face portraying no emotion whatsoever. On the inside however, she was screaming. She wanted to tell him how he'd reverted back to the unreachable man he was when she turned down his marriage proposal. She suddenly wanted to hurt him as much as she'd been hurting over the past weeks. She wanted to tell him how cruel he was being to her. But she had to remind herself that he wasn't doing it intentionally. Security work was all he knew for years. It was so natural to him, it was as if he breathed it. Rage, sadness and pain ripped through her like a bolt of lightning, forcing her to break into involuntary tears.

* * *

It was 6:00pm and Joseph had already left for the airport. He had meant it when he said he'd be leaving in an hour. Clarisse didn't know whether to feel angry or hurt, and so she felt both.

"_Maybe I should get Amelia's advice on this situation. She's a young girl, and probably __knows more about relationships than I ever did.." _Clarisse thought. But after a few minutes of going over what she could possibly say to her granddaughter, she dismissed the idea. She knew she needed to get her feelings out, but she was far too ashamed. Ashamed of not being able to keep Joseph happy as his wife.

She decided it was best to sleep on it, and decide whether or not to confront Mia in the morning.

Instead of going to the kitchen, she had Olivia bring up some tea. Just as she finished putting on her pyjamas there was a knock on the door.

"Come in Olivia." Clarisse called as she entered the living room. When the door opened, she was surprised to see Mia walking cautiously in, also already in her pyjamas.

"Grandma? May I come in?" Clarisse sighed. She felt she had been neglecting Mia ever since she arrived him from America, and she wanted to make it up to her; but she wasn't positive she felt like talking at the moment.

"Mia, dear. How nice to see you!" Clarisse smiled as warmly as she could and motioned for her to sit down on the sofa beside her. At that moment, there was a second knock, and Olivia entered with the tray.

"Thank you Olivia." Clarisse said as her maid set the tray down, poured a cup of tea, and quickly left.

"So Mia, what can I do for you?" She said as she poured milk into her teacup.

"Grandma, I was wondering if everything is okay. You know, between you and Joe."

Clarisse felt her heart drop. Apparently this couldn't wait until the morning.

"What are you talking about darling?" Clarisse tried.

"Well.." Mia repositioned herself into a cross-legged position. "I was talking to Joe today, and he didn't seem very happy. Now all of a sudden he's on a plane to the U.S for a few days?" Mia paused and looked for a reaction in her grandmother. Nothing. Clarisse stared into her cup.

Mia contined. "I asked him if there was a security issue there, because I wasn't told anything about it, and he only nodded. When I asked him if you were accompanying him, he said no and then quickly excused himself.."

Clarisse didn't look up.

"Grandma.." Mia leaned forward and put her hand on Clarisse's. She was surprised to find it cold and shaking. "Did you and Joe have a fight or something?"

Clarisse tried desperately to stay calm. She'd been good at hiding her feelings her whole life, but she found that when it came to Joseph, everything was different. She started to tell Mia that everything was fine, but she couldn't speak. She felt her granddaughter move closer and put an arm around her. She unconsciously leaned into her and accepted the comforting gesture.

"So you did have a fight.." Mia said sympathetically.

"N-no.." Clarisse managed to say, confusing Mia. She took a deep breath. "We didn't have a fight. I.. I don't know what's wrong with him." She finally looked up, and Mia could see tears threatening to fall. She had never seen her grandmother this upset before. Usually she was so calm and collected. It was obvious how much her grandmother loved Joseph, and how deeply hurt she was by the way he was acting. So she did the only thing she could think of at the moment, and fully embraced her.

As Mia held her tightly, Clarisse's tears fell rapidly. "A g-gran-d—daught-er should-n't have to comfort her grandm-oth-er like this."

"Shhhh Grandma, it's fine. Everyone needs to let their feelings out somehow."

"I don't understand." Clarisse cried. "He's been like this for weeks now. Some days he seems fine, but lately he's been so miserable. He barely even says goodnight to me any more, let alone goodbye when he left this afternoon." She sighed. "This is so childish of me. I'm sorry Mia."

"You're not acting childish Grandma. I'd feel the same way. When Joseph gets back, tell him how you feel. Maybe you'll get a response from him, and you guys can work it out. You WILL work it out, I know it."

"But I've tried talking to him about it! He doesn't listen." She shook her head and rested it in her hand.

"Don't worry Grandma, he'll come around. I know it. You two are meant for each other, and this thing isn't strong enough to pull you apart. I know Joseph loves you with all his heart, and he always will."

Clarisse paused. "What if he leaves?" she whispered. Mia could barely hear her, but the panic in her voice was evident.

"He won't, I'm sure of it. I see the way he looks at you. His eyes brighten just at the mention of your name. He may not show it right now, but he feels it deep down."

Mia held her grandmother for a while until she calmed down. She contemplated whether it was best to give Clarisse some space, or keep her company. If she and Nick got in a fight, what would she feel?

"Do you want me to stay with you tonight?"

Clarisse laughed. She was a grown woman, surely she could handle a few nights by herself. However... "Mia, dear, you're so good to your old grandma." She patted Mia's hand. "I would actually really like that."

Half an hour later they were nestled in bed; Clarisse on Joseph's side and Mia on hers.

She inhaled deeply, filling her senses with his cologne. Was he missing her? Did he know how much she longed for him to hold her close again? She felt Mia stroke her hair comfortingly, just like she had done many times when Mia was upset. It was nice to not have to spend the night alone in that large bed. "Thank you" she whispered.

"I love you Grandma, goodnight." Mia hugged her and nestled close.

"Goodnight sweetheart, I love you too." Clarisse yawned, and fell into a somewhat peaceful sleep.


End file.
